A Busy Year

Tom Says:

Hi Everybody, I really, really wanted to tell everyone how much I love my wife and I thank God everyday for my beautiful bride. She is a Godly woman who cherishes and cares for our family both physically and spiritually.

 

It’s been a busy year and this is only the start. Work is sending me on travel a lot this year; some of it is schooling and the rest is we’ve got projects all over that need to be worked on so I will be gone a lot. Because of this she has had to be both Mom and Dad in many cases dealing with all 8 children, the house, schoolwork, medical appointments, and so on, all on top of being pregnant. And while I’m also very proud of my older children, Ethan, Phoebe and Leanore who’ve also stepped up and are helping more around the house, with the littles, with housework, with cooking, etc… it is Mary who has to shoulder the majority of the load and I know it wears on her.

But I also know that God has gifted her with incredible strength and she truly is the strongest most caring woman I know.

My little man Tolly had surgery on his head today; I’m not sure if we mentioned it before, but one of the issues with Aperts is the bones in the skull knit together too early and the skull stops growing. Surgery was necessary to relieve the pressure in his head and give his wonderful big brain room to grow.

 

I was no help, but Mary came up with a great plan. A bunch of friends from church volunteered to watch the kids, so they all got to go on “sleepovers,” all the littles were paired up with a big, and our van is being used by one of the families, they will pick-up the other kids and take them all to Co-op while Mary is at the Hospital with Tolly. Mary told me that yesterday while she was dropping off all the other kids one by one, Tolly was upset because he wanted to go too; when they finally checked into the Ronald Mcdonald house he was so excited to be on a sleepover with just him and Mama.

Mary and Tolly had to be there early so they could do one last catscan and then the pre-op procedures. Mary got to hold Tolly while they put him to sleep (I had to do that when they did his fingers) she said she cried, (well so did I,) but that’s alright. She called me throughout the day to keep me informed of where they were at, and finally late in the afternoon she called me to let me know that it was over and he was resting in Post-op. She said he looked like he’d been run over by a freight train, but all the Drs were very pleased with how it went and say he should recover nicely. He’ll spend tonight in the PICU and hopefully tomorrow will be moved to a regular room.

People that say there are no miracles anymore don’t realize how much God blesses us through the people and situations around us; you and I know the truth.

Mary and I want to thank you for your continued love and prayers.

updates....joys....praises....

Things have been busy. Have I said that before? Well, it's still true. That and by the end of the day, I'm pretty tired and don't feel I have the brainpower to pull off a post. Really need to get better at this stuff. Anyway...

Let's see, we have celebrated our first Christmas with Alina and Vitaly. They were so much fun! Vitaly was blown away by the presents, Alina was a little less enthusiastic. :) I think Vitaly has found his new favorite holiday. Wait until Easter. Not only do we celebrate a risen Savior, but we get candy too! Something he can eat gets higher favor than anything else!

All the kids did well at the presentation night for our homeschool co-op. The Littles and Middle sang songs with their classes, while Lee and Phoebe were in a full musical drama.
One of the best parts was when Alina and Vitaly's class got up on stage (yes, Ukranian orphanage musical director, THEY were on stage!!) (Sidenote, they were not allowed to perform with the other kids in their group at the "orphanage children celebration") The chorus of the song they were singing went like this: "Everybody ought to know, everybody ought to know, everybody ought to know....who Jesus is." Vitaly sang LOUD and CLEAR......."Know, Jesus" with a smile all over his face. If those are the only two American words he ever learns, than that is enough! KNOW JESUS.
Alina wouldn't sing, but loved being up there with her classmates. She danced and smiled during the whole song. Which is good, cause I was just a little nervous that she would have a meltdown from overstimulation. Unfortunately, our camera wasn't working so well that night, so no pictures. You'll just have to use your imagination. :)

Overall the night was a huge success! Trudy was a little drummer girl and such a cutie pie! Sophie and Holly were angels and did awesome! Phoebe and Lee continue to blow me away with their acting ability and their hearts to have fun. Phoebe got to share the gospel message at the end of the performance which made this Mama's heart flutter. Lee also did a marionette puppet show with her art class. Amazing! She was selected to do a solo dance to a celtic song and did fabulous. Am I bias, you bet!! The high schoolers don't do anything for presentation night, so Ethan was off the hook and just got to be an audience member cheering on his siblings.

So much has been going on lately that I'm going to put everything in bullet form, just to make it easier.

* We celebrated our Little Trudy turning 3 years old at the beginning of Dec. My how time has flown. She is such a little "Big". She asked the other day, "When Vitaly and Alina take a nap, can I stay up?" Mom - "uh, no". Trudy, "But I'm a Big kid now, Phoebe told me so." She is spunky and fun, while arnery and stubborn. WE LOVE HER TO PIECES!!

* Vitaly had surgery to free the last two fingers on his left hand a few days after Christmas. He did great and really likes his new fingers!

* We celebrated our first New Years together thanking God for the trials and triumphs that He led us through/to in 2011.

* Ethan had surgery in Jan on his shoulder from a football injury last season. He is doing well now and is in physical therapy in order to get back in shape and ready for spring training!

Ethan #31

* Our Alina turned 6 years old at the end of January and officially became a Middle in the family. :)  My goodness, it's hard to think of her being that old since she is still the same size as Trudy! We didn't celebrate because Dad was out of town, but will this weekend. She has gained 10 lbs since coming home and is showing MUCH more energy.

Our Middle monkey, Alina.

* We will also celebrate Sophie (8) and Vitaly's (5) birthdays this weekend while Dad is home. They are only two days apart (well, three years and two days). Sophie is excited to share this with her little brother. I can't wait to see his face when we bring the cake out for him. He has been to a few family birthdays already, but when it's his turn to blow out the candles I can just see him laughing. Sophie is turning 8 and I can hardly believe it! She is getting so big so fast that I have to stop blinking so I don't miss anything. She is turning into such a good big helper and a good little basketball player! Thank you Lord for all the birthdays that we get to celebrate!!

Our soon to be 8 yr old Sophie!

Two peas in a pod. Very happy with "our boys".

* Vitaly is going in for surgery on his skull in two weeks. In October, the opthamologist discovered pressure on his eyes (something like that, he didn't want to sit still so I was rather occupied). Then in the two months after that she noticed that the pressure was increasing. After meeting with pediatric neurosurgens, it was noted that his brain is continuing to grow, but his skull had fused shut. This is part of his Apert Syndrome.
So, they advised us that he would have to have 4 surgeries on his skull done in order to make room for his brain to grow. All this was to be done when Tom is out of town for work. The first surgery required Vitaly to stay in the hospital for one week. I would have to be with him. Argh!! How was this going to work?! But I was recently reminded that God is good and faithful. Okay, I sometimes forget that and try to work things out for myself after worrying over them. Wonderful friends have stepped forward and offered to keep the other kids for the whole week while I would be with Vitaly at the hospital. We are humbled and blessed by these people and hope that we can return the favor someday. God worked out problem #1. Then, at a meeting with the surgeons, we were given more relief. After looking things over, they are hopeful that only two surgeries will have to done. The first is to open Vitaly's skull and cut a section of bone, then to insert expanders which we will have to turn a tiny bit every day for 30 days. The second surgery is to take those expanders out. And that the first surgery will probably only need a hospital stay of 3 - 5 days. YAY!! Our friends had offered to take the other kids for the whole week, but honestly, I want to keep them as friends and was worried about overstaying our welcome! :) Bonus, the dr said that turning the expanders every day would not hurt Vitaly! God works out problems! Now, how do I keep an active little boy busy in a hospital room for 3 - 5 days? Oh well, we'll see. :) The other kids are excited to be going on an "extended sleepover". The docs will check again in several months to see if the pressure is going down or if they need to do the other surgery (to open the front of his skull) too.

* We are 4 months away from our new addition arriving. Yes, I'm pregnant. Yes, it was planned. Yes, we are VERY excited. What? Oh YES, the children are also excited. Really. We love the fact that God has put a love of children into our children as well. They get it, that life is a blessing and God is the One who gives it!Oh and guess what.......... she's a girl!!  Oh yeah, you read that right! A GIRL! That will make 7 girls and 2 boys. After 14 yrs, we finally figured out how to get Ethan to stop asking for a baby brother. He was hoping this one was a girl as he didn't want to change anymore poopie diapers! Tolly has helped our oldest son see the wonderfulness of having sisters!! After being told that the baby is a girl, Ethan replied "Good. There's a reason God only had one Son. Well, if you think about it, sin is like poop, so God changes everyone." I love that boy  young man! The way I see it, God is giving us the privelege of raising up godly wives and mothers for the next genertion of godly men. What a humbling perspective. Thank you Lord!

* We are smack dab in the middle of some other major life changes and waiting to find out what the future holds for us. We know that God is sovereign and am trusting Him to guide our paths, wherever they may lead.

* We are also in the middle of our basketball season. We have one cheerleader (Holly), one assistant coach (Ethan) and three bball players (Sophie, Leanore and Phoebe). The kids participate in a church league called Upward. We have participated in this since Ethan was 10, it is a great program and we highly recommend it! That being said, it takes up our Friday evenings (practices) and Saturdays (games), but it is only for a season and the kids really benifit. The church where we participate have been super sweet to us and we're thankful for them.

Our beautiful Leanore.....

Our new teen sporting her new haircut. Love ya Phoebe!

Holly adores Alina. Family, looks good to me.

The Littles/Middles love to climb on big brother.

Three months home...(4 months now, this was written a few weeks ago, but not posted til now)

Here is our first family photo....

Aren't we cute?! Okay, I should have done something to my hair, but look past that please.

It is hard to believe that it has been three months now since we brought Alina and Vitaly home. Some days it feels as if they've always been here. Then there are other days......

I had a few rough days last week, the kind where you just break down and wonder what God was thinking when He picked you for this ____________? Then after my sobbing and pity partying was done, the Holy Spirit had me look at things from a different perspective again. Look at all that you're family has been through in the last three months and tell me things aren't better.

For instance:

Vitaly - His vocabulary is increasing all the time. He can say about a dozen English words (including the names of all of his siblings). And he knows/uses about 10 signs. He is a smart little boy! He is also learning to count and can sing along with the ABC song. (Thanks to Ethan!) He is not as hyper as when we brought him home (most days) and is doing a better job at toilet training. You may remember that when we first came home, he was pooping about three to four times a day. And didn't care to use the toilet for it, let me tell you. Now he's down to once, maybe twice a day and will hold it until we take him to the bathroom. He still doesn't tell us when he has to go, but we've come to know the signs and he doesn't fight us. much.

He is learning a song to sing at our co op presentation night. He repeats many of the words and follows along with the hand motions. So much in just a short amount of time. He is remarkable!

Alina - She has gained three pounds since coming home! And she has started putting cookies back into her mouth, just gnawing on them for now, but that shows that she is moving in a good direction.  She used to have a fit when I would lay her down to change her diaper (the nannies didn't lay them down for this, it was done standing up), but now has no problem even on a diaper changing thingy in bathrooms. She used to really feel unsure on those things. That is a BIG deal! She is not just sitting anymore, she is exploring, getting into things, and filling the house with a unique laugh when she gets tossed around. The girl loves to be in motion. Big brother loves to fill this position and hear her beautiful laugh and see that smiling face.

Ethan just swung her up from an upside down flip. :)

Trudy - Has gone from being the baby of the family to almost having a twin. Alina (5 yrs old) is the same size as 2 yr old Trudy. Her feelings of competing with the NA's are almost gone. She is getting so big and so smart. She is excited to help Alina with pouring her drink or getting her a toy. And she congratulates Vitaly when he goes to the bathroom (in the bathroom :).

All the kids - have adjusted so well to having two new ones. They continue to amaze me and make me thankful. Sure, having two new ones added to their responsibilities too, but most of the time they don't seem to mind. Hey, they're not perfect. :) I love them all to pieces!

Holly helping Alina pick berries and put them in her cup.

Something else that helps to keeps things in perspective: thinking about where they would be if we didn't get to them. They both would have been transferred to an adult mental institution. We've seen a female one, I'm glad Alina will never step foot in one to stay. And Vitaly, we know where he would have gone. A remote mental institution for boys from 5 yrs old - adult. The lady who advocated for him to raise his grant fund adopted her son from that very institution just last year. Her and her husband were there. They know exactly what it was like. Our son would not have survived there. If you'd like to read about that place, go here http://covenantbuilders.blogspot.com/2011/10/on-rainy-days-they-stayed-inside.html

Rough days here are better than any day there. Lord, help me to keep this perspective.
That website also has another post about helping out a ministry that is now allowed to go to that institution to visit the boys and bring needed items. Please read about it and consider donating http://covenantbuilders.blogspot.com/2011/11/meet-lost-boys.html
We know the couple that leads that ministry. She was our translator in Ukraine and the couple that allowed us to go to the womens institution to help them. They are wonderful people.

Our November birthday.....

belongs to Phoebe, who recently turned 13!!

Happy Birthday to our beautiful young maiden!

I promised Phoebe that on her 13th birthday, I would take her to a salon to get a pedicure. She has been eagerly awaiting her time.....(WARNING: pictures of feet follow)

Mom got red.....

Phoebe got bright green...

Just yesterday, she was two yrs old like our little girlie. My how time flies.

Her birthday weekend was a very busy one, so the plan is to have her actual party in Dec. She wants to take her friends to a ceramics shop. Should be loads of fun!

Happy Birthday Phoebe, Dad and I  love you more and more each day.

Great visits...

We've taken our official third road trip since coming home with the new additions. We went and visited some lovely friends that we hadn't seen in awhile and got to meet their two new additions. We had a wonderful time with them, Thank you Scoda's for your warm hospitality and of course, your friendship. I got to meet a new cyber friend as well. It was nice to "meet" you Holly and see your lovely family in real life. :)

We "camped" out in our travel trailer at a lake there. Our trailer was made to sleep 10, and we have filled that capacity. Okay, sleep 10 it can. (Dr. Seuss there) But what about those times when it is not time to sleep yet and you have 10 people (four of which are 5 yrs old and under) just hanging out. They don't put that in the fancy colored brochure. Notice that there are only about four people in the nice brochure. There's a reason for that. I'm starting to rethink this camping idea. :)

While there the three oldest and I also got to go to a small Toby Mac concert. It was really cool and affordable. I really like him. I was the mom in the balcony dancing and singing all the while her kids are shrinking away. Except for Lee, she stayed and sang with me. :) Love that girl!

On the way back home we got to do something else that was really cool. We had arranged to meet up with some new friends. Julia advocated for Vitaly that helped raise his grant money to the $5,000 that we needed in order to adopt him. It was wonderful to meet with her, her husband and their youngest boy who also was recently adopted from Ukraine. How nice it was to thank them in person. And they got to meet the little man for whom they were shouting from the rooftops for. Good deal all around.

Aaron, Julia, and Vitaly. Thanks Julia!

Oh, and she loved on Alina too. :)

If Julia wouldn't have advocated for Vitaly, he might still be over there. Alone. Since we are Christians, we know that she did not act of her own accord, but that she was following the leading of the Holy Spirit, so we give our ultimate thanks to God. Thanks to her obedience though, we were ready to obey when called to bring Tolly home too. God has awesome plans! He is the Master Weaver of intricate details. WOW, just thinking about how things transpired still shocks me, for lack of a better word.

Short story: We were hoping to go and get Alina in Feb 2011 but the process took longer than I had expected and things seemed to be dragging. ( We had known some adoptions to go thru in just a few months) Until we got the call that we were to be there in late May. Looking back I can see now that Vitaly's grant fund would not have been there had we gone in Feb like I wanted. Or even in March, etc. God placed His hand on everything at the right time so that the money was THERE when we needed it. Thank you Lord!

The Leanore Post.....

Who's the birthday girl?

Yep, you guessed right.

 

Always up for adventure,

with a perfect smile,

And a good sense of humor (teeth from Dad, humor from Mom).

Happy birthday to one of the sweetest people we know. We love you bunches Leanore!

You are at the right place....

Mary says...

I'm just trying out a new look for the blog. The winter and barren tree scene was making me kinda sad. And since we are moving into a new season in our family, I decided to have the family blog reflect that. This one is a bit peppier and shows a lot of books. Which I don't get to read right now, but am making my kids read our kids are loving to read. (Look Amy D., I did it, I changed it on my own! I'll let the kids do the next one.)

Actually we have some avid readers in the house. Even the non-readers love to pick up and peruse books. And of course they love being read to. I don't do it as often as I used to or as often as I should. But I'm working on it.


All of the kids have been to the dentist, only one itty bitty cavity between them. BOOYAH! The dentist even got to look at Alina today. Alina in NO WAY let the hygenist touch her mouth, but we insisted that the dr be allowed to look in there. She was very quick and saw a good deal of plaque build up on her gums. By the end of the visit, Alina was smiling at the dentist and holding her new toothbrush. I love this new dentist, she sat next to me (I was holding Alina in the chair) and talked calmly and would occasionaly rub Alina's leg to get Alina familiar with her. You know you have found a good dentist when your kids actually ASK to go back. No kidding, they did. And her and her husband starting homeschooling their son this year. Oh yes, we'll stay. :)
It has been a rough couple days around here. I believe that I have discovered why (mostly). There has been a lot of out of the house activity, sometimes just me on errands, and sometimes with some or all of the kids. Our family is used to being on the go, but it really throws off the new additions. Which in turn throws me off, and if Mama ain't happy, ain't nobody happy. So, I'm not sure how to address this issue right now, but it does need to be done.  We didn't really understand how much routine would mean to the new ones. We (insert I because my husband knew this all along) thought that we'd be able to just add them right into our routine (or lack of it) and keep going. Finding that to not be the case. Imagine that.

Every day is a learning opportunity to see what our new children can keep up with and when they need things slowed down. What they can handle and what is too much stimulation, break in routine, absence, etc. Tomorrow will be another test. We have a birthday party in the afternoon, then we split and some go home while others go to a corn maze. Then Saturday is Upwards basketball/cheerleading sign up and a football game. Slowing down will come sometime. Or we'll have to artificially make it come. Christmas. That will be a lovely time. :)

Another reason for rough waters lately is our lovely 2 yr old. The girl with the pink arms in the former post. That's nail polish by the way. She didn't like it when it came time to take it off. Lesson learned I think.
She's been getting into everything and being very clingy. We suspect that she's wanting to make sure that she's not forgotten about or replaced. We shower her with love everyday, and she continues to get into stuff. Not sure what else to do but pray and love on her. She adores her new siblings and is sweet and loving toward them. Thank God for that.

The biggest reason of all, I haven't been reading my Bible as much as I should. I know that I am in a "busy season" right now with many little ones, but what I need to refresh is in that Book and I should go there.
Note to self: Read Bible daily. Don't put it off. God loves you and wants to refresh you with His Word. Do it!